Finding the middle ground

I am trying to balance being a young adult and a new mom. It's a hard place to find yourself. And I honestly feel like I have lost myself. Sometimes I don't even feel like a mom because I am living a home, without Danny, and have no concrete connections with others moms. Having Luke has certainly shown me who in life will be there for me. I am blessed with really great friends and with the opportunity to meet with other moms. It's hard though because no one really understands exactly what it feels like to be in-between. All I can do is pray that Danny and I will be able to move out sooner then later and really start our family the way God intended it. For now though I will just try to focus on the blessings in my life, the largest of which is Luke.

Three A.M. feeding and I look down at my baby overwhelmed with the feeling that this is what I'm supposed to be doing with the rest of my life.

The last two months have been quite an adventure. Late nights and early mornings, growth spurts and midnight feedings. Walks and first trips to the park. Rolling over and bouncing off your legs. Luke's done it all and more. Every moment is such a gift. I feel so undeserving of it all. God has truly blessed Danny and I with not only a great baby boy but also with lots of love and support. We can't not thank each person who has been there for us through this all.
Sunday was mothers day and I could not have asked for a better first mothers day. We really celebrated for the whole weekend. Friday we went to a mother daughter dinner at Danny's church, Saturday my sisters and stepmom can up to visit, Sunday dinner with my mom and Danny's family. Not to mention the gifts that Danny (and Luke) got me. Flowers and a CD, to arrive sometime this week, and a beautiful letter from Danny. This message in a bottle reminded me just how much I love him and how much I long to start our life together.
I can not wait for more adventures, challenges, laughs, and oh those baby smiles!